you who shifted me

You arrive unexpectedly as you always do
Rearranging the contents of my heart
Teaching me things about myself that I didn’t know I needed to learn
You push me into the great unknown encouraging me to feel my way through the discomfort
You make me smile
You make me laugh
Together we create memories

You who played the guitar by candlelight
Showing me how beautiful it is to be vulnerable
You who somehow got me to try sushi
When I was living in a world of peanut butter and jelly
You who reminded me to slow down, step deep into nature, and appreciate the breeze on my skin
You encouraged me to explore and together we found new places
You who drove across three lanes of a highway and kissed me for the first time in the ocean
You and I hiked the tallest mountains and lounged for hours on the beach
You who expanded my music collection by introducing me to new artist and different songs
You rode with me to the lighthouse and took a dip in the water
You weren’t afraid of adventure and came with me to visit the Indian Tree

You, this collective gathering of people that have flowed in and out of my life
You have left your mark on my heart
And leave me filled up with gratitude for all the moments we got to experience
You opened up my world
Pushed me forward and help me discover myself
You gave me air to breathe when I felt I didn’t have any
You surprised and delighted me
You helped me trust the butterflies
And leap into the great unknown

I remember how I thought that you and him would make great friends
How I had to step down into your living room
The first time you smiled
I remember pulling off the side of the road and listening to the rain drops hit the roof of the car
The moment we had to say goodbye
The way the room felt so tiny when you walked in it
I remember the park
The freedom I felt when I jumped onto the bicycle
And how the moment I saw you I knew it was going to be so good

Everything changed when I met you
The contents of my heart rearranging to find open space for you to fall deep into
I wanted to let you in
For you to see all of me
I wanted the moments to last a lifetime
And in my heart they do
Memories held close
As things shift and change

It is you that I am grateful for
The time we spent together
The chance you took
Thank you for adding to the story of my life
For writing a chapter or even a single sentence together
We may travel separate paths now
But the impact you have made on me will stay with me forever

gratitude

Gratitude is a part of my daily life.  I am grateful for the small moments.  The ones that may seem insignificant to others, but to me they mean everything.

A warm cup of tea.
The way the sun glistens off my windshield.
My favorite radio program playing in my car on the way to work. 
A kiss goodbye as he still slumbers in dream land.

These every day moments are precious.  They fill my heart with love and joy but only because I stop to appreciate them.  It could be easy to just keep going.  To never take the time to think about and savor how much they fill me up.  Our lives are filled with moments, and there is always something lurking around the corner.  But I choose to slow down.  I choose to pause, reflect, say thank you.  

It is important to acknowledge the beauty and grace around you.  To not just let it slip through your fingers un noticed.  When you savor the small moments you have the opportunity to tuck them into the memory bank of your heart.  It is inside there they flourish and grow, feeding your soul and encouraging you to keep looking out for the precious beautiful moments.  

Life fly's by in a blink of an eye.  If we don't slow down and recognize how deeply amazing it is, we may just miss it.  In this moment right now I am grateful for the way the sun is shining through the porch door.  For the warm weather and the way my body carried me through a five mile fun this morning.  I am grateful to be right here on my couch, spilling these words onto the page.  My small apartment engulfs me with love and I feel it.  I know I will miss this place when we move on.  I try not to take this moment for granted.  This simple moment of peace and quiet where it is just me, the sunshine, and the sound of the keys typing out these words.  It may not look like much to anyone, but to me it is everything.  

How about you?  What are you grateful for in this moment right here?  I would love to here you share your gratitude in the comments.  When we speak our words of gratitude out loud we reinforce how much it means to us.  What a divine practice.  Never stop pausing to say thank you.  

be in the moment

We had all been through so much this past year.  Life as we knew it had changed forever.  Relationships altered, holes left in our hearts, everything different.  Nothing ever to be the same again.  

Moments slipping through our fingers as we try to gain our footing in this new way of living

Yet here we were, gathered with family along the oceans edge.  Life slowed down even if just for a moment.   Deeply submerged into where we were and who we were with we savored the laughter, let go, and really enjoyed each others company.  It was divine to hear my Father's laughter.  To see him smiling and having such a good time.  He stepped deep into the moment and savored it all.  

Memories forever etched in my heart.  This wasn't just about getting away for a few days.  No, it was so much more than that.  It was a breath of fresh air, a reminder to keep moving forward, an infusion of love from family.  It was arms wide open, warm sunshine, and a deep breathe in.  

I felt the weight of the world lifted from my shoulders as we settled into an easy routine of doing whatever moved us. Walking through the ocean, gazing up at the stars, dancing in the kitchen.  It wasn't fancy.  There was no fan fare.  It was life, beautiful loving life.  Where we were surrounded by family and enjoying being where we were in that exact moment.  

I am so grateful for this time away.  For the moment to let go of the worries and feel the hope that is in front of us.  My mom may not be walking the journey with us, but she is there.  She is always, always there.  And she would want us to keep stepping forward.  She would smile to see us enjoying the moment and soaking in the warm sunshine.  The beach was her happy place. When I am near the ocean I feel close to her.  Being right next to the ocean for a few days I felt my mom strongly in my heart.  I felt her smile as we ventured off on the paddle boards and I felt her sitting with us as we gazed up at the stars.  

She is looking down on all of us.  So proud of the way we have come together.  It makes my  heart smile and brings me hope for what the future holds.  I am so grateful for it all.  For family, love, and being deep in the moment.

Gathering brings us together.  Feeling the love of family infuses me with hope.  Being in the moment reminded me of how incredible life is.  Even amongst the heartache, the struggle, and the tears there is so much goodness.  I am so lucky to have the incredible family I have.  So grateful for trips taken and moments of being able to be together in the moment, yes present in the moment.   

love letter to play

Dear Play,

I have much to learn from you.  About letting go, not worrying about what others are thinking, and just being present in the moment.  You push me to my edges.  You encourage me to stretch, to reach, to grow.  You bring out my laughter and plaster the biggest smile across my face.  

When I am entangled up in you I forget about the weight that I am carrying around on my shoulders.  I feel as if the world opens up to me and possibilities are endless.  You give me hope to keep on trying and you remind me of the simple joys in life.  

Oh dear play you infuse me with happiness.  You take an ordinary day and make it extraordinary.  

It is not always easy for me to fall into your arms.  There are times when my guard is up and I am unsure of how to let you in.  But once I do I realize how much I need you.  Life without play just isn't a life at all.  

I am grateful to Dustin for always reminding me of you.  He nudges and nudges, knocking down my wall and bringing out the silly in me.  He always get's me to play.  

Thank you for stretching me.  For creating the very best memories.  For infusing laughter.  For brightening my day.  For reminding me again and again what an integral part of my life you are.  Oh dear play, you make this world a brighter place.  

xo
Jennifer

Join me in 14 days of love notes and write your very own love note to play.  How do you show up in the world and play?  What way do you integrate play into your everyday?  I will be writing one love letter a day for fourteen days.  For it is love that makes the world go round.  

love letter to the world

Dear World,

You give me so much.  Stunning sunsets, beautiful days, fresh air to breathe deeply into.  You create this magical work of art that I get to walk through each and every day.  I know there are many days when I do not appreciate it.  So many days when my head is down, my heart is heavy, and I am rushing from one thing to the next.  But you never give up on me.  You always surprise me.  You fill the steps I take with beauty and drop feathers right beneath my feet when I need them most.  Oh world, you fill me up in so many inspiring ways.  Always giving, giving, giving, and never once asking for anything in return.  You allow me space to go whenever my heart wants to travel, and when I am there you show up with your brilliant colors painting the most beautiful scene.  

I am filled with so much gratitude for you.  Grateful for the way you show up and share your light.  You give me so much space to be me.  You challenge me to work through the seasons and shine my light in the darkness.  Thank you for all you do and all you are.  

xo
Jennifer

Join me in 14 days of love notes and write your very own love note to the world.  What would you thank it for?  What are you grateful it has given you?  Each day from now until Valentines day I will be writing one love letter a day.  For it is love that makes the world go round.  

mistakes were made

Yesterday I sent a letter to my mailing list {you can read it here} and there was an enormous grammatical error.  Throughout the letter I wrote "your good" instead of "you're good".  I didn't realize I had it wrong until some very kind friends pointed it out to me.  {Thank you!}

Upon first learning that I made this mistake my heart dropped.  That letter went out to my entire list and there was no way to correct it.  Eeeekkk!!!  I was extremely embarrassed and those little voices in my head began to shout some harsh words.  I was brought back to a post I read awhile ago where someone was upset that they bought a product that had a few grammatical/spelling errors in it. She felt that it was a direct reflection of who the person was and how much they cared (did not care) about their work.

I have never been great at grammar. My eighth grade English teacher can attest as I spent hours and hours after school getting extra help. I do not feel that my mistake is a reflection of who I am or a lack of carelessness....I simply got it wrong.  Thank's to those dear friends I now know the proper way to use these words.  A lesson I hope remains engrained in my brain.  

I am human.  That means I am forever learning and growing. I can't let my mistakes define me. I need to keep moving forward a little bit wiser and with the lesson learned tucked into my pocket.  I am not perfect and will never try to be.  I am uniquely me, mistakes and all.  

I have learned that sharing the truth of our stories brings us together.  We all make mistakes and that is okay.  We cannot let our fear of making a mistake hold us back.  We must show up in this world and give it a try.  It is in these moments that we grow and expand.  

Final e-course of 2015!  

I am excited to announce my final e-course of 2015, Heart Notes.  They say we teach what we most need to learn and that is very true for this.  I invite you to join me in this soulful class where together we will close out 2015 with love, tenderness, and reflection.  

You have journey through another year.  Your feet have taken many steps, memories have been made, hearts have been broken, love has been shared.  There are so many moments to be grateful for, to celebrate, and even to let go of.  Join me December 2nd - January 1st and look back on all that has been.  

As we gather together for four weeks on a private blog we will explore the following themes:

Week One :: Taking Inventory
All companies end each year taking inventory of what is left.  This helps them plan for the new year.  You will do the same.  Taking an inventory on how you feel, where you stand, and what you are still carrying around.  

Week Two :: Celebrating What Was
You have done so much this year, YES you have.  Let's take the time to properly celebrate what was.  Through ceremony and a formal toast let's acknowledge how much you have accomplished!  

Week Three :: Letting Go of the Hardship
Not all moments in a year are beautiful and grand, but it is every moment that makes up who you are.  There are some moments that you no longer need to carry with you.  Through journaling exercises you will be able to let go of these moments and say goodbye.  

Week Four :: Dreaming and Scheming
What do you envision 2016 to look and feel like?  Through vision boarding and quick journal exercises you will uncover what you most desire for the new year and how you want to feel.  

Week Five :: A Final Goodbye, and a Brand New Hello
Yes, is time to say goodbye to 2015 and hello to 2016.  You will write letters, send notes, and prepare yourself to step boldly into 2016 with a wide open heart.  

Let's clear space so that you can boldly step into 2016.  

Join me today!    $42.00

Looking forward to closing out the year with YOU!  If you have any questions about Heart Notes please drop me a line at jbelthoff@gmail.com