showing up with love & kindness

As a LOVE Champion I believe strongly in showing up to life with compassion. Human beings all have the same innate desire to be seen, to be heard, to be loved. We all want to be in community with others and find a space where we are comfortable and confident standing in our own light.

However, it is not always easy to show up with love. When someone has caused you pain, chosen to judge you, or won’t invite you into their space the hurt can sting and bubble up. This pain causes a ripple effect where you make your own judgements and shut yourself down. But what if instead of standing in the pain you chose to rise above and choose love?

“We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.”

— Carlos Castenada

You have the power to choose how you are going to react to a situation. You can choose to show up with love or hate. You can choose to listen or shut it out. You can choose to invite someone in or close the door on them.

Not everyone will agree with you. Not everyone will act the way you want them to. Not everyone will do what you thought they would. But you have the power to choose your reaction. The mind is a powerful tool.

The Law of Attraction is the belief that what we focus on we attract. If you focus on the negative you invite more negativity into your life. If you think you can’t do something you’ve already started three steps back and have a bigger mountain to overcome. But if you shift your thinking and choose to seek out the positive and show up with compassion you invite more love and kindness into your world.

It is not always easy to do, especially when things are rough and you struggle to find the good. One of my go to self-care life changing practices during these difficult moments has been Metta Meditation. This type of meditation is intended to evoke a feeling of love and kindness for yourself and others.

Here’s how it works. Start by getting into a comfortable position. Let your body rest and relax. Let go of any expectations you have. Gently close your eyes and repeat the following words as you picture yourself.

May I be happy
May I be healthy
May I be joyful
May I be peaceful & at ease

You begin with yourself because you can’t love others unless you love who you are. For three minutes {or any amount of time that feels right for you} repeat these phrases. After focusing on yourself choose someone you love. Picture this person in your mind and repeat the same phrases.

May you be happy
May you be healthy
May you be joyful
May you be peaceful & at ease

After you have focused on someone that you love think of a person in your life who you are struggling with. Picture them in you mind and repeat the same phrases holding close love and kindness for them. After you have focused on this person shift to a broader picture of everyone in the world and repeat the same phrases.

As you go through this meditation you are opening up your heart and sending out love and kindness. This meditation can be done anywhere and you can choose the phrases that you want to say. It does not have to be exactly what is above, choose what you need.

The other day my heart was feeling rather dark. I was going down the rabbit hole of judgement and getting frustrated over the situation. As I sat in the nail salon I choose to do this meditation rather than continue to get upset. It was incredible how focusing on love helped lift the darkness that was swirling. I left the nail salon smiling from ear to ear and feeling so much lighter.

It may be difficult at first to send love to the person you are struggling with, but remember they are human and we don’t know all that they are struggling with. But what we are able to do is send them a bit of love and kindness.

This meditation has been life changing for me. It has taught me to slow down and choose love over anger. It has helped me release my mind of judgment and choose compassion. I feel so much better after I do it.

The world could use all the love that people are willing to give. By doing this meditation you are choosing love! Go ahead and give it a try! Would love to hear how you felt after in the comments below.

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thank you for your friendship

I am grateful for you and the way you hold up the mirror and reflect back all that I cannot see.  Without you my world would be dark.  I would fall down the rabbit hole of despair and be unable to find my out.  You walk along the path with me.  You listen when I speak and you listen even deeper when I am silent.  You know how I am feeling without me even saying a word.  What a gift you are in my life. 

As human beings we are our own worst critic.  We pick every little thing apart about ourselves, things we never would pick apart to a good friend or even a stranger.  So why do we do it to ourselves?

You remind me of the good I hold.  You invite me to slow down, take a step back, and see with fresh eyes what is really right below the surface.  You show me that I do have much to offer and you help me to not doubt myself.  

Together we laugh so hard that tears stream down our cheeks.  We jump in the car and hit the road not sure of where we are going but enjoying every moment of the adventure.  You show up with chicken noodle soup when I am sick.  You climb the stairs with advil in hand when I can't bear to move a muscle out of bed.  You bring with you joy, love, and comfort.  You remind me again and again that I am not alone and you always reach out your hand.  You understand how hard it can be to ask for help so you don't wait, you just come right in.  

You have helped me create a lifetime of memories that fill my heart with happiness.  You have seen me at my very best and at my worst.  You never once judged me even when you should have.  You accepted my mishaps and mistakes and helped me find my way back to myself.  You told me when I needed to knock it off, buck up, and just forget about it already.  Your honesty is what has helped me through. 

You have been a shoulder to lean on and someone I could call on anytime night or day.  You knew me back when before so many scars, before so much pain, before I made so many mistakes, but also before so many incredible memories, happiness, and joy.  You knew me then and loved me and know me today and still continue to love me.  

I am grateful for YOU.  For your wide open heart and incredible friendship.   Life would not be what it is today if you were not here traveling this adventure with me.  I want you to know how much you mean to me and how bright your light shines in this world.  

Thank you for the hugs.  Thank you for the laughter.  Thank you for always listening.  Thank you for the walks and the coffee dates.  Thank you for everything!  I adore YOU!  

three things I need you to know

Deep in your heart there are truths that you know.  You learned them from your experiences.  Many have been unearthed through your struggles.  Others have come to you in your joy.  And still there are some that you have learned through your day to day living.  You cannot deny these truths but sometimes you need to be reminded of them.  

In the Love Notes Postcard Project this week I asked the participants to share with their partner three things they need there partner to know.  Three truths that are living and breathing in their own hearts.  Yes, there are many more than three but what three would you share?  

Three things I need you to know is:

1 - You can do hard things.  Yes, you can.  It will not always feel comfortable and there will be many times you will want to throw in the towel and just walk away.  But it is through this discomfort that you grow and unearth strength and wisdom.  You learn deeply from these challenges and you emerge stronger, braver, and wiser than you were before.  The hard moments become a badge of honor.  A measuring stick for what you are capable of.  And you will rise up again and again and again.  Because YOU, yes you, can do had things. 

2 - You are not meant to travel through this journey alone.  When you open up your heart, share your stories, and invite others in you unearth your tribe.  You find those individuals who cheer you on, stand beside through the good and the bad, and want to see you flourish and grow.  Together you do amazing things!  It is human nature to want to feel connection with another.  But this only happens when you let down your own wall and share yourself.  You find joy in these connections and together you travel through each journey.  

3 - Having a practice of gratitude helps you unearth the beauty and joy you have in your life.  When you take a moment each day to give thanks for even the smallest of things you invite more joy and love into your life.  Your heart softens and see how even a smile from a stranger can mean everything. When you practice gratitude you become more aware of the little moments that make up your day and see how divine they are.  Gratitude helps center you and encourages you to not walk through this life blindly, but rather take care of the moments and appreciate them. 

What three things do you know?  Share them in the comments below because we learn so much from each other.  

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Because we aren't meant to travel alone

I invite you to gather with me.  To show up as you are and share a piece of your heart.  I promise to be sharing a piece of mine as well.  Let's spend an afternoon of creative connection together.  If this sounds even a little bit intriguing to you click below to sign up to receive the invitation.  I hope that you will join me.  It would be wonderful to meet face to face.  

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you are a divine human being

Take time to give thanks for who you are
And all you have created in your life
You are stronger than you realize
Braver than you know
And perfect the way you are
You bring a unique gift to this world that no one else has
Know this
And stand in your own light
Continue to reach for your dreams
Celebrate your successes
And push yourself to keep on growing
Give thanks for everything that surrounds you
And know that you have the power to create your own destiny
Trust your path
Even when it doesn't seem clear
Or feel like the direction you should be traveling
Believe in yourself
Always
You are a divine human being
Never forget this

gratitude for the small moments

"When you hold onto gratitude it is like you are holding onto a precious gift" 

I invite you to pause for just a moment
Slow down
Find something to be grateful for
Yes, just one thing
The ground beneath your feet
The way the blanket felt on your skin this morning
How the sun shines bright into your living room
How she laughs with her entire heart and it's contagious
What brings you joy
What lights you up
What makes you smile wide
Show gratitude for this
Give thanks for what it has brought you
A moment of peace, a smile, a feeling of comfort
Life is beautiful when we seek out the beauty in the small moments
It doesn't need to be life altering
Monumental or incredible
The simple ordinary moments shape us
They make up our days and fill up our lives
Savor these ordinary moments
Appreciate there simple elegance
And give thanks for each one

the boy in the bright yellow shirt

As I put one foot in front of the other on my morning run I spotted him in the distance.  He was hard to miss with that bright yellow shirt.  From far away I did not give him much thought but as I got closer I was intrigued.  He was not who I thought him to be. Rather he was much younger, between 11-14 years of age.  He was riding along with who I guessed to be his Father.  His hands clung to the rail on the side of the truck as his Dad jumped off and picked up the trash cans.  It made me smile thinking how he was witnessing how hard his dad worked. 

I turned the corner and the thought of him left my mind until we crossed paths again.  I watched from afar as he jumped off the truck, grabbed the trash, and threw it in.  He was right there in it and he was working hard.  Filled with enthusiasm he ran a few cans ahead of the truck pulling out the bags of trash and running with them to the next can.  He then waited on the sidewalk for the truck to catch up with him and when it did he ran to throw them in.  

As I passed him he smiled and said hello.  I told him he was doing a great job and I kept on running.  

That moment stayed with me for the rest of the day.  This brief interaction between me and this child left me feeling inspired and happy.  He was throwing that trash away with so much pride and enthusiasm my heart swelled.  He was doing something maybe not a lot of people would choose as a job, and he was smiling.  

He was doing a great job, but the other two guys that were with him were also doing a great job.  They were showing up day in and day out and keeping things clean.  If we didn't have them doing the job they do things would be a lot different.  

I wondered if anyone ever told them they were doing a great job.  They deserve to hear it just as much as that little boy in the bright yellow shirt.  These men work hard and I am so grateful for the work they do.  This thought of saying thank you to them came to me long after I had passed them but has stayed with me and next time I see them I am going to be sure to stop, say thank you, and let them know they are doing a great job.