you may need these words

Dear 18 Year Old Self,

I know that you are wise and strong. I see how hard you try. In standing where I am today and knowing what I know now there are some things I want to share with you.

I invite you to show up to life and be ok with making mistakes. We all make them, it is a part of growing and learning. Do not be so hard on yourself. Life is about falling down and finding your way back up again.

Keep an open mind and open heart. Listen when others speak. Allow them a chance to express their own beliefs and opinions before you jump in. Even though you may not agree with what they have to say you may learn something.

But don’t let others opinions jade your own. Stand in your truth, especially when you know in your core what is right for you. Follow your heart, it will never steer you wrong.

Life can only be tackled one moment at a time. Don’t worry about the final outcome. Just make the next right move.

You know that desire that is burning in your heart? Go after it with everything you got. Never give up on your dreams. Chase them, chase them, and continue chasing them until you make them happen.

How you choose to speak to yourself is so important. Your words have energy. What you speak you invite into your life. Choose words of love, kindness, and compassion.

Get plenty of sleep but also enjoy those late nights chatting with friends or snuggling with your significant other.  And speaking about friends never ditch them for the person your dating. Your friendships are important but in order for them to continue to flourish you need to make time and tend to them.

Savor the little moments that make you laugh so hard your side hurts.  Try new things.  See new places.  Meet new people.  Stay open to life. And remember, people aren't mind readers.  You have to tell them what you are thinking.  

I know that you are going to do great things in this world. Keep reaching for the stars and sharing your smile. The world wants to see you shine!

xoxo
Jennifer

These words were inspired from the first writing prompt of the Love Notes Postcard Project. I had participants to share with each other what they would tell their 18 year old self knowing what they know now. It is amazing that the words our 18 year old self may need to here you may also need right now in this moment. Life is cyclical. You are constantly reminded of the lessons you need to learn again and again.

This was me at 18 years old. I thought I knew it all. I was ready to take on the world, yet I had no idea what the world had in store for me.

I didn’t know that I would fall to my knees more times than I can count. That my heart would break over and over and over. That I would get lost, make terrible choices and be unsure of where to go next. I had no idea how hard it would be.

But I also didn’t know that I would have strength to stand back up again. I would do things I never thought possible. I would meet the most incredible people and have the most epic experiences. I would carve my own path. I would find my way back to myself and I would stand tall in who I am.

Life has this way of pushing you to your limits. Making you stand in the uncomfortable. Forcing you to make tough decisions. In order to thrive you have to learn who you are and what you believe in. You have to stand up for yourself even when others don’t agree.

It easy to look back and see what you could have done better. But what matters most is where you are right now and what that next right step is. Choose joy. Choose love. Choose YOU!

Pull out your notebook and write a letter to your 18 year old self. What would you want them to know. What lessons have you learned along the way that you think could help then on their journey?

Share in the comments what you would tell your 18 year old self as there is someone out there who may need these words as well.

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showing up with love & kindness

As a LOVE Champion I believe strongly in showing up to life with compassion. Human beings all have the same innate desire to be seen, to be heard, to be loved. We all want to be in community with others and find a space where we are comfortable and confident standing in our own light.

However, it is not always easy to show up with love. When someone has caused you pain, chosen to judge you, or won’t invite you into their space the hurt can sting and bubble up. This pain causes a ripple effect where you make your own judgements and shut yourself down. But what if instead of standing in the pain you chose to rise above and choose love?

“We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.”

— Carlos Castenada

You have the power to choose how you are going to react to a situation. You can choose to show up with love or hate. You can choose to listen or shut it out. You can choose to invite someone in or close the door on them.

Not everyone will agree with you. Not everyone will act the way you want them to. Not everyone will do what you thought they would. But you have the power to choose your reaction. The mind is a powerful tool.

The Law of Attraction is the belief that what we focus on we attract. If you focus on the negative you invite more negativity into your life. If you think you can’t do something you’ve already started three steps back and have a bigger mountain to overcome. But if you shift your thinking and choose to seek out the positive and show up with compassion you invite more love and kindness into your world.

It is not always easy to do, especially when things are rough and you struggle to find the good. One of my go to self-care life changing practices during these difficult moments has been Metta Meditation. This type of meditation is intended to evoke a feeling of love and kindness for yourself and others.

Here’s how it works. Start by getting into a comfortable position. Let your body rest and relax. Let go of any expectations you have. Gently close your eyes and repeat the following words as you picture yourself.

May I be happy
May I be healthy
May I be joyful
May I be peaceful & at ease

You begin with yourself because you can’t love others unless you love who you are. For three minutes {or any amount of time that feels right for you} repeat these phrases. After focusing on yourself choose someone you love. Picture this person in your mind and repeat the same phrases.

May you be happy
May you be healthy
May you be joyful
May you be peaceful & at ease

After you have focused on someone that you love think of a person in your life who you are struggling with. Picture them in you mind and repeat the same phrases holding close love and kindness for them. After you have focused on this person shift to a broader picture of everyone in the world and repeat the same phrases.

As you go through this meditation you are opening up your heart and sending out love and kindness. This meditation can be done anywhere and you can choose the phrases that you want to say. It does not have to be exactly what is above, choose what you need.

The other day my heart was feeling rather dark. I was going down the rabbit hole of judgement and getting frustrated over the situation. As I sat in the nail salon I choose to do this meditation rather than continue to get upset. It was incredible how focusing on love helped lift the darkness that was swirling. I left the nail salon smiling from ear to ear and feeling so much lighter.

It may be difficult at first to send love to the person you are struggling with, but remember they are human and we don’t know all that they are struggling with. But what we are able to do is send them a bit of love and kindness.

This meditation has been life changing for me. It has taught me to slow down and choose love over anger. It has helped me release my mind of judgment and choose compassion. I feel so much better after I do it.

The world could use all the love that people are willing to give. By doing this meditation you are choosing love! Go ahead and give it a try! Would love to hear how you felt after in the comments below.

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finding the trial markers

One foot in front of the other as I follow the yellow trail. Up the mountain, around the lake, and back down. This has become one of my favorite places to walk. It is a good balance between climbing and flat terrain with the added bonus of being near the lake.

One foot in front of the other. The worry, the fear, the feelings of not being good enough slowly begin to melt away with each step. I do not need to know where I am going. I just need to keep an eye out for the trail markers as I continue moving forward.

My body falls into a comfortable rhythm. The sound of the dirt and leaves crunching below me calms my heart. It is just me and the trees. There is no where else I need to be. I can take my time here.

For the past four months I have been unearthing unknown ground. Being unemployed has shifted me and pushed me up to my edges. I feel uncertain about the future. It is hard to commit to plans because I do not know where I will end up. What I will be doing? What will my time commitment be? It all feels uncertain.

As I follow the yellow trail I wish that there were trail markers for this unknown journey. Something lighting the way and showing me where to go. People tell me to embrace the unknown and yes it is an exciting time but it is also a scary place to be.

There have been times it has filled me with doubt. Wondering if I am good enough. Wondering if someone will ever want to hire me. Wondering what it is I really am meant to do. Many times in the past four months I have pulled the Angel card that speaks about “service”. It continues to remind me to show up and serve others and everything else will work out.

I want to carve my own trail. Leave the markers that light the way for others. Be a guide during there toughest times and place that they can come to rest and heal. But what does that really look like? How do I create that trail?

Just like anything else in life it is one step at a time. One small micro movement which brings you closer to unearthing life’s biggest plan. Right now for me that next step is to find a space to host a retreat. It has been a dream that has lived and breathed in my heart for so long and it is time for me to stop playing small and start playing BIG!

And even there are no trail markers guiding my way I know that I can blaze my own path and create a trail that others can walk with me on. And so I begin.

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embrace the journey

There are moments in life when the path feels unclear. You don’t know if you should slow down, speed up, or just stop all together. You try to listen deeply to what your heart is saying but there is so much uncertainty you can’t seem to hone in on what you truly want.

You feel twisted and unsettled. You have no idea where to go. You want this uneasy feeling to be over with already. You wish you could click your heels and be standing on the other side. Looking at if from a different vantage point. The view of having made it through.

But here you are in these uncharted waters. Deep in the uncomfortable growth is happening. You are learning to steer your own ship. You are figuring out slowly what the next right move is and you are taking it. You aren’t rising in leaps and bounds but you know that all you need is be right here.

You know you will find your way somehow. You always have. Even when you were at your darkest points you rose above from the ashes. You learned to stand on your own two feet and walk again. If you did it then you can make it through this.

Life has a way of throwing curves balls all the time. It is not in avoiding them that you become who you are but in facing them head on and learning how to swing. Do not be discouraged when you strike out. You will get another chance at the plate.

Remember your strengths. Don’t shy away from who you are. Don’t try to push down this uncomfortable feeling. Be fully in it.

You don’t know where you are going to end up. Embrace the journey. Live in the moment. Cry when you are sad. Laugh when you are happy. Invite others in. Share your story and know that you are never alone.

how I spent my summer vacation

Do you remember that first day back to school in September?  Your teacher would ask you what you did over summer vacation.  He or she giving you just a brief moment to summarize everything that happened.  But how can you do that in one quick second?  

 My heart is filled with summertime stories.  The types of stories that included sun kissed skin, melting ice cream, and lots of fresh air.  There were all sorts of adventures and traveling down unexplored roads.  Late night giggles, lots of sunshine, and feeling the sand between my toes.  

It was a summer I want to hold onto.  A summer filled with love, adventures, and traveling down unknown roads.  It was an opportunity to let go of the everyday routine and allow my heart to lead me where I wanted to go.  

I am grateful for all baseball games.  The many days at the beach.  Sinking deep into yoga and finding my way back to meditation.  

I am grateful for the brilliant colors this world shows up with.  Epic sunsets in the most stunning orange hues.  Brilliant blue skies and white puffy clouds.  

Adventure awaits around every corner.   It will not come knocking.   You need to go after it.  There is beauty out there just waiting for you to experience it.  

But sometimes you just need to stay where you are and sink deep into slowing down.  My front porch was a welcome invitation.  It provided me a space to journal, read, and deeply breathe in the fresh air.  Time on my porch is like medicine for my soul.  

There were books.  So many books devoured.  'Marrow: A Love Story' by Elizabeth Lesser ... 'Secrets in Summer' by Nancy Thayer ... 'How to Walk Away' by Katherine Center.... were just a few.  I became best friends with the library again, spending time writing there and exploring the shelves.  

There was live music, new restaurants, fish caught, weights lifted, time babysitting, sand castles built.  Many baseball games, a foot ball game, a golf tournament.  It was the summer of epic adventures.

As it comes to a close I want to remember to savor it all.  All to often I am moving quickly from one thing to the next that I do not take a proper moment to celebrate and appreciate what was.  There is lots to appreciate about this past summer.  

And so I am heading out to my front porch with my journal and taking some time to reflect on all that was.  The memories, the feelings, the taste, the sounds.  The beauty and delight.  Laughter and tears.  Heart expanding moments and road blocks that forced me to push through.  I want to remember it all.  To stand in glory of the goodness as well as the the shaky uncomfortable ground.  All of it makes up what this epic summer was.  

I invite you to not let the feelings slip away to quickly.  Take a moment to reflect.  You don't jut have to do this alone in your notebook.  Get those you love involved as well.  Around the dinner table ask everyone to share their favorite summer memory.  Ask them what summer taught them.  Their answeres may surprise you. 

My top five summer memories are?

The feeling I do not want to forget from this summer is . . . 

One thing I learned this summer is ...

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know your worth

You are the one carving out the road before you.  You decide where you are going to go, who you are going to take along on the journey, and when you are going to stop to admire the view.  Yes, you are the one holding the map and choosing the final destination.  

As I stand on this unknown ground I been savoring the moments I would not have had the opportunity to enjoy had I been working.  This has been an epic summer.  Exploring different places, spending time with family, and finding new roads to go down on my bike.  So many memories created and tucked inside my heart. 

But then there is this little voice inside my head reminding me that I have yet to get a job.  It makes me doubt my worth, doubt my skills, doubt my ability.  I wonder why it is that I haven't heard back from places.  Why I didn't get a chance at the ones I really wanted.  And what is it that my future holds.  The negative self talk has been fierce.  

I need to shut down the negativity in my head and remind myself of my worth.  No one really knows what they are doing.  We all tend to make it up as we go along.  What matters most is the willingness to put yourself out there and take a chance.  I am proud of myself for the chances I have taken but also know that there is so much more that I want to go after. 

I need to stand tall with my head held high and my shoulders back.  To speak with confidence.  To believe in my gut that I can do whatever it is I put my mind to.  

I am

+ a creative thinker
+ a problem solver
+ patient
+ a good listener
+ grounded and mindful
+ kind and compassionate
+ able to express my heart through words
+ thoughtful
+ a hard worker
+ determined
+ brave
+ able to admit my mistakes
+ not afraid to try new things
+ passionate about my work
+ wanting to help people unearth their light
+ me, and there is no one else like me

Taking a moment to sit down and write who I am reminded me of all I have to offer.  I am an asset.  I am ready to learn, grow, and develop into my next iteration.  We all have iterations of ourselves and throughout our lives they reveal themselves. 

There was a time in my life when I was the shy quiet kid just trying to blend into the background. Over time I grew more into myself as I learned who I truly was.  I am still learning and know that it will be an ongoing lesson.  

I love unearthing where I want to go as I listen close to my hearts deepest desires.  I want my front porch to continue to be my office.  I want to help people step into their own light.  I want to create and cultivate community.  I know that I can do this.  I just need to keep taking risk's and stepping forward.  I also need to ditch the negative self talk and speak those kind words that I know to be true.  

And so I am taking my I Am statements and writing each one down on a slip of paper.  Each morning as I sit in front of my alter and write that days intention I will read these words out loud.  Reading them out loud will help imprint them on my heart. 

Sometimes we needed to be reminded of how amazing we really are.  Be compassionate with yourself and give yourself that reminder.  

Who are you?  I invite you to write down your own I AM statements.  Be bold, be kind, be brave with your writing and really share who you are in all of your radiant glory.  

Share a few of your I AM statements in the comments so that I can celebrate who you are, exactly as you are!

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