in this moment

In this moment I know that I am so much stronger than I ever have given myself credit for
In this moment  my heart is broken, but it won't be broken forever
In this moment I know that I need to get back to moving my body
In this moment the page is calling and now is the time to begin writing my book
In this moment I know that I have an amazing support system that I am beyond grateful for
In this moment I have a safe space to land
In this moment I know that I must choose love, always
In this moment I have to be tender with myself
In this moment I know that I must allow space to heal
In this moment I cannot forget about laughter and joy
In this moment I know that there is so much goodness
In this moment I must lean in, open up, and share my voice
In this moment I know that I will never get back today so I must choose to live it

Where are you, in this moment?

{In this moment ... is a prompt from my free Heart Notes class that I am closing out the year with}

turning heart break into heart opening

Two years ago my mom passed.  It all happened so quickly and was very unexpected.  Since that moment I have been in a dark place.  It wasn't until recently that I realized how deeply I have fallen into this darkness.  So deep that I have lost my way.  

In this moment my heart has been shattered into a million pieces and can see for the first time how that darkness has taken over me.  You would think with the passing of my mom that I would learn to appreciate every day, that I would understand how life is short, and we never know when it is going to end.  But rather than appreciate the moments I was consumed with all the things she would be missing.  So consumed that I began to miss the little moments that were happening in my day to day life and I began to take this life I am living for granted.  Things began to slip away as I dug myself deeper and deeper into my hole.   

But as I stand here now with my heart broken I see how precious life truly is.  How we never know what is going to happen next.  We can think we have it all planned out and then a curve ball is thrown our way and everything changes in an instant.  

My heart break has lead to a heart opening.  As I have been navigating this new direction and trying to find my way in this new world I am unsure of where I am going or how I am going to get there.  But one thing I do know for certain is that I cannot waste this time.  I can't live in the sadness of what I have lost.  I can't be afraid of what my future holds.  I have to be grateful for all that was and be ok with what can no longer be.  

With my heart wide open I am inviting others in.  Letting them see the pieces of me that I have kept safely tucked away for far to long.  I am showing up and sharing who I am and how I feel.  I am choosing to break through the wall that I have been hiding behind for far to long.  

My life isn't perfect.  There are things I need to work on.  I have my highs and lows.  But we as human beings all have these things.  It is once we start unearthing these layers that we begin to see we are more alike than we are different.  We begin to learn that we are never truly alone in this world.  There are people who are willing to reach out, grab your hand, and pick you up when you feel you cannot do it yourself.  There are people willing to listen to your heartbreak, give you a hug, and let you know that they are here for you.  

And so I step forward into this new life.  The one I didn't think I would be living in.  This unknown territory.  I am unsure what the future holds for me.  But I trust that it will be beautiful, filled with love, grace, gratitude, and kindness.  I believe wholeheartedly that what you put out into the world comes back to you.  And so I am putting out love, lots of love.  

I am also opening up my heart and sharing my voice.  Because life truly is to short for us to not to.  And even though it is not always easy living with a protective wall up is so much harder than living with your heart wide open.  

And so this heartbreak has lead to a heart opening and for that I am eternally grateful.

share your heart

The world will open up to you, when you open up to it.  It takes courage to speak from the heart.  It takes strength to share your story.  But it is needed in this world.  Yes, it is!  What you have to say matters.  The stories you hold, the love you share, the way you show up ... all of it matters.  

It has taken me time to learn these lessons.  A lot more time than I care to admit.  I can put pen to paper easily.   But ask me to speak these words and I struggle.  Afraid of what others will think if I open my heart.  Afraid of judgment.  Afraid of not being understood.  

Yet I have recently stood in the face of fear.  Showing up exactly as I am.  And I was embraced and held.  I was seen.  I brought something to the table and showed up so much stronger than  I ever thought I was.  I never thought I was the one brining something to the table, but I am.  And you are to!  

You, exactly as you are is a gift to this world.  What you share with those around you is important.  You must continue to show up.  You bring a unique perspective.  When you share your stories you encourage others to share as well.  Do not be fearful of showing others who you are.  It is necessary and so very needed.  

I have struggled for far to long with showing up in this world.  Thinking I was meant to be invisible.  But no one is ever meant to not be seen.  Know this and feel it deeply inside you.  I see now how my thoughts, feelings, and opinions matter.  I see how I have a way of teaching others just by being me.  This my friends, is powerful.  When we understand that our presence alone effects those around us we show up in the world with much more intention.  We do not take for granted the time we have and we respect the energy we give out.  

When you walk into a room you bring a certain energy with you.  Others feel this and it effect their energy as well.  What do you want others to feel from you?  How do you want to show up?  

I encourage you to examine the way you show up in the world.  To notice the energy you carry with you when you enter your home or office.  See how this energy effects those around you.  Be conscious of the strength your energy holds.  See how you can shift it into a positive feeling.  

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Looking to close out the year with others?  Individuals are gathering in the classroom to savor and learn from all that has been.  Together let's take the time to sink deep into the moments, celebrate the successes, and let go of the hardships. Let's clear space to boldly step into 2018 with a wide open heart.

I invite you to close out the year together through a FREE offering that invites you to slow down and reflect.  Join us HERE. 

you are a divine human being

Take time to give thanks for who you are
And all you have created in your life
You are stronger than you realize
Braver than you know
And perfect the way you are
You bring a unique gift to this world that no one else has
Know this
And stand in your own light
Continue to reach for your dreams
Celebrate your successes
And push yourself to keep on growing
Give thanks for everything that surrounds you
And know that you have the power to create your own destiny
Trust your path
Even when it doesn't seem clear
Or feel like the direction you should be traveling
Believe in yourself
Always
You are a divine human being
Never forget this

braving the darkness blues

Here on the east coast we have fallen behind with the clock.  We gained an hour of sleep but I feel as if I have lost my way.  The time change in the fall is always hard for me.  I know the cold is coming and leaving work in the dark fills me with the blues.  All I want to do is  curl up in bed.  It is this time of year I know I need to push myself harder than I usually do to stay active and motivated. 

There is much beauty in the world.  The leaves change to vibrate yellows and reds.  The sunset lights up the sky.  The morning darkness provides a moment of quiet reflection as I ease into the day.  Even through the cold I need to push myself out the door.  Fresh air fills my lungs with hope and wakes me up to the world.  

I know that this is a hard time for me and so I need to lean in deep and ask for help from others.  I need to let them know when I am struggling and not allow myself to fall down the rabbit hole.  When I talk about it I feel much better and it doesn't feel so hard.  I need to be more vocal.  

It has ben a while since I have spent hours in the coffee shop writing.  The fall and winter months are the perfect time for me to get back to this.  I miss those moments of collective togetherness hand in hand with solitude.  It is time for me to get back to the page and spill open.  Maybe, just maybe the book that is living and breathing inside me will begin to take shape.  

It is time for me to embrace this darkness.  To give it space to breathe inside me.  For when we stand in the darkness the light becomes that much more beautiful.  One of the reasons I love living in NJ is I get to experience all four of the seasons.  It brings an opportunity for me to reflect as I shift into the change in the weather.   

And so we begin, another shift.  Another moment to begin again.  

How do you handle these transitions?  Do you have any tools in your toolbox that help get you through?  Together let's brave the blues.

moving beyond

Making your way through this journey called life can feel hard at times.  There are moments of pure joy and elation and other times when you feel as if you cannot pick yourself up the floor.  And then there are those moments when you are floating in the space between.  Blindly going through life.  Moving from one thing to the next without truly feeling or experiencing it.  

How do we move deeper into the moment?

Each day I wake up and follow my morning routine.  I drive the same way to work.  Go in and out of the same doors.  See the same people and have similar conversations.  Every Monday we ask what the other has done over the weekend.  Every Friday we talk about what we are going to do with our time away from the office.  I eat a lot of the same meals.  Go to bed around the same time.  

I feel as if I am living my life on autopilot.  

How can I break this cycle?  Do I need a monumental change or can small things shake it up?  I want to feel this life more deeply.  Be present in the moment and take in experiences and interactions I am having.  I do not want to just have a conversation with you about the weather.  I want to get to know you more deeply and I also want you to get to know me.  

We have to be willing to show up and share our stories.  Letting your guard down invites others in.  When you show up and allow yourself to be seen you give others the permission to do the same.  This is where connection blooms.  This is what takes us off autopilot.  

You don't have to move to a new place to experience new things.  You my just have to take a new route home.  There is a world out there right around your block that you have never experienced.  Go ahead and explore it.  What is there might change you.  You never know until you give it at try.

We get comfortable in life.  We know what to expect.  We know where to go.  But in order to grow and develop we have to move past that comfort.  We have to do something that scares us.  It is going beyond this fear that forever changes us.  

What one thing can you do today to take you out of your routine.  To push you to connect with someone new, nature, yourself?  How can you challenge yourself to go beyond?  

This is your one wild and precious life. Live it wide open.  Explore.  Grow.  Expand.