ramblings from a park bench

/

I am sitting in the middle of this city

So much is going on around me

People passing by

Each on their own journey

I hear snippets of peoples lives

Snapshots of their most intimate details

Entering my ears as they rush by

Feelings of amazement wash over me as I sit here

I am trying to do my best to soak it all in

To really look at how different everyone is

Yet understand that internally we are all the same

A beating heart

Blood pumping

Thoughts

Ideas

Feelings

All of these unseen things connect us

They make us more similar than different

We are more than the clothes we wear

We are more than the job title we have

We are more than the music we listen to

I fantazie about where each of them is going

What is it they are up to

I wonder what their life is like

It is so easy to get soaked into our selfish existence

Forgetting that their are others out there

People we have yet to meet

They are living life

Going through all sorts of things

Struggling, standing, falling,

And picking themselves back up again

I can see more clearly now

I am not the only one that feels pain and happiness

I am not the only one who stumbles time and time again

I am not the only one learning how to gain my footing in this world

There are people out their with broken hearts

They feel lonely, inadequate, and unloved

Their are others out there living life

Soaking in the beauty of the every day

In fact there is a whole world of people

Each of their lives is different than my own

They know different people

Do different things

Have different experiences

Yet they all have one thing in common

They all feel something

Each person experiencing pain, happiness

Laughter and tears

It may not look the same to you are I

But the feeling is the same

Taking the time to sit and watch others

I am able to soak all of this in

Their is much to be seen

Much to be heard

The lives of others are unravelling before us

I let go

/

I sat by the river

Collecting my thoughts

Pulling out all the things that were lurking deep inside

I sat there alone for a long time

Listening to the sound of the water rush by

The voices of nature eased the words from my soul

For to long I have been gripping these things tightly

Things that no longer served me

Things that were not mine to own in the first place

I knew it was time to bid them farewell

But I also wanted to honor and thank them

They were each their for me in the moments I needed them

So I let my pen do the talking

Naming each of them and giving them praise

Showing my gratitude for what I learned during our encounter

Then with love I said my goodbyes

Letting them know that they were off on another journey

Destine to find someone else that needed them

I did what I had to do

To heal this piece of me

I let go

Pressing on

/

I stand here in the thick of it

Wondering how it got to be this way

Is it written on my forehead

And I cannot see it?

Is it a part of me, always will be

And I need to accept it?

How did it get to this point?

Who was the one directing the traffic?

I do not like standing here, right here

I am not meant to be in this place

I need to keep moving

Traveling to the places that free me

I am the one directing the traffic from now on

I will not accept what currently is

I will keep pressing on

Until I arrive at home

Summer Memories: Beach Volleyball

/

This summer I got to spend some Saturdays waking up bright and early, traveling down to the shore with Brian, and spending the entire day on the beach watching him play beach volleyball. I love that he invited me to go down with him. It was such a nice experience. Driving down together. Chatting in the car. Discovering new music. Watching him play. Learning more about him. And soaking in some sunshine and a couple of naps on the beach. Life is incredible.

I am so honored to call Brian my brother. So proud of the life he has created. Brian finds the joy and fun in the everyday things that encompass his life. He is always willing to play, laugh, and have a good time no matter what it is he is doing. He is his own person. So strong, caring, and loving. He lives life enjoying what he loves doing and is passionate about so many things.

I know that if I ever needed anything Brian would be one of the first people there for me. Over the past couple of years we have gotten closer and it has been such a wonderful blessing in my life. I am also lucky that I work close to where he works. It gives us the chance to get together for lunch. There is no better way to break up a day at work than sharing lunch with your older brother.

Not only is Brian an incredible brother to me but he is also a loving husband and an amazing father. I look up to the relationship that he has with Laurie and hope to one day have that for myself. They are so kind to each other and that is so extremely important. I just adore watching him interact with Hannah. It makes my heart swell with pride. I knew that he would be a good father, but to watch it unfold in front of me is incredible.

Having the opportunity to spend time with Brian this summer was one of my favorite memories. I am so incredibly lucky to have such an amazing older brother to look up to.