write it down

Standing in front of him there were so many things I wanted to say, but I couldn't.  Emotions were swirling and I struggled to formulate the feelings into sentences.  He stood there in front of me patiently waiting for me to get it out, but it never came.  

"Write it down" he said as he looked around for a piece of paper.  "You write what you are feeling, I will read it, and we will go from there".

This was new territory for me.  Usually when I am struggling with my words frustration emerges from the person I am trying to speak to.  Often times people become impatient with my need to slow down and digest what I am about to say.  I need time to process and think.  Words do not just spill out randomly.  Each word and thought is woven together carefully.  

At first it seemed strange to be writing to him as he sat next to me on the couch.  But once the pen started moving my feelings began to come together and tell the story of what I was going through.  I wrote things that I couldn't have imagined speaking out loud.  I crossed out, began again, and what emerged was my hearts truest expression of what I was struggling to say.  

I was not nervous to pass that piece of paper to him because I knew those words said what I so desperately struggled to speak.  My feelings were clear.  I expressed exactly what I wanted to say.  I had time to process and really hone in on what I was going through.  

As I passed him the piece of paper a huge weight lifted from my shoulders.  Now that the emotion was out I felt that I was ready to speak about it.  He read my words and from there we began a conversation.  It was a new point of entry; beginning with words on the page and leading to a deeper understanding of each other.  

Had he not paused and asked me to write it down the conversation would have been much different.   I would have struggled, got frustrated, and gave up.  It had happened so many times before, I knew the drill.  But he was tender and kind.  He knew how I worked and instead of pushing me in a direction I struggled with he graced me with the opportunity to be exactly where I knew how to be.  

:: Writing is a gift.  The blank page provides us all the space we need to let go, sort through, and begin again.  Are you drawn to the page but intimidated by it's vastness?  Are you unsure how to begin?  Are you a seasoned journal writing looking to infuse different inspiration into your work?  Join me for a 21 day journey into brave journaling where we will show up to the page for 21 days and let our heart and hand do the talking.  You may be surprised at what they have to say.  We begin on November 1st.