good enough

Previously the digital world was filled with perfectly curated moments.  It was only the things people wanted you to see and not exactly what was true in the moment.  The tiny corner in the room that looked fabulous but left out the mess that was next to it. The precisely edited video that cut out all the missteps and outtakes.  It felt a bit like rainbows and butterflies and not exactly what true life was.  

However, that need for perfection has shifted a bit in the midst of this new uncertainty that the Corona Virus had laid on us.  During this time of social distancing where we are asked to be apart, we are longing more than ever to be together. We want to hold onto some sense of normalcy and are seeking out new and different ways to connect.  

This has opened the door for the messy, imperfect, authentic moments to unfold.  Fumbling with online video, sound not being exactly right, the background behind you a bit in disarray.  It’s ok if you don’t start exactly on time. It’s ok if you try to figure it out while people are on the line.  It’s all ok.  

This moment in time is unique because it is something we have never gone through before and we are all figuring it out together.   We have no idea what tomorrow will bring, in fact, no idea what the next hour will bring. All we can do is show up where we are, exactly as we are.  Even if, and especially if that is not the sparkling versions of ourselves.  

Maybe you choose to get dressed today and put on makeup.  Maybe it’s 8 pm and you realize you haven’t gotten out of your pj’s.  Both are totally ok. You need to do what feels right for you and ditch any ideas of perfection.

The dishes in my sink are piling up.  There are stacks of books on my studio floor.  I am still rocking my comfy clothes. I am giving myself permission to just be as I am.  To do what feels right.  

And I am showing up where I can.  Taking it all digital and getting in front of the camera even when it feels uncomfortable.  Creating Zoom calls to connect my nieces and nephews with their other cousins. Giving them activities they can do virtually together so that they can see one another and laugh.  Happy hour’s with friends and family. Communing with other teachers in the area for virtual gatherings. Creating a place to land with a weekly virtual Community Circle.  

None of it is perfect.  There have been missteps along the way.  Moments when I fumble over words or have no idea what I am going to say next. But it’s good enough, and sometimes that is exactly what we need, good enough.  

I invite you to show up exactly as you are.  Perfectly imperfect. Knowing that you, as you are, is good enough. And that is all the world and those around you need right now. 

it's been awhile, and so much has changed

Hello Courageous Hearts,

It has been a while since I have been here and so much has changed. Life as we knew it has completely turned upside down. Whoever thought just a few short weeks ago that we would be where we are today. My heart weighs heavy with all that is going on in the world, but what I have also witnessed are amazing acts of courage, kindness, and compassion. I feel that more than ever we need one another.

This time of “social distancing” has me hunkering down, appreciating what surrounds me, and seeking out new ways to connect. I feel blessed for technology and the way it is keeping us virtually together.

I have also been putting pen to paper. Taking time each day to document what is happening around me. Noting what is closing, how I am feeling, what I did that day. It feels good to get it down.

I am trying to move my body more often. Working from home has me sitting stagnant for hours on end leaving me feeling exhausted. But I have been starting each morning with a workout and trying to get in an afternoon run or walk. It feels good to move.

I have also been taking time to notice what is around me. Notice the small things that I would usually hurry past. Before this all began I was in a constant rush, rush state. Planning Girl Scout Meetings, going to events, working my 9-5 and also on creating my dreams. I had very little time to slow down and just be.

And now here I stand with all of you. With nowhere to go. Nowhere to be, except be home. And when I am not working I am trying to slow down the pace. Dustin I are cooking more meals together. Going for walks. Zoning out watching Netflix. We are on this rollercoaster ride of emotions together. Sometimes we are doing great, other times the weight of what is going on weighs heavy on my heart.

I am learning to be more compassionate. To not judge myself when I just want to crash on the couch and do nothing. But I am also enjoying connecting with others virtually. It is interesting how I feel more connected to the people I work with then I did when I was in the office. This common unknown bringing us together.

Here’s what I know in this moment:

• We are all in this together.

• I (and you) are not alone. Even if you are living alone. you are connected to this community. Please reach out if you are feeling lonely and know that we all feel that way at times.

• We need each other now more than ever

• Music makes me happy and lifts my spirits

• Fresh air fills me up as well

• It is necessary to reach out

• It is ok to cry

• It is also ok to laugh, be silly and have fun

What is it that you know right now in this moment? I encourage you to write them down so that when you are lost you can turn to that list and be reminded.

One of the things I have been asking myself in the wake of this is “what can I do to help?” “How can I serve?” And although I can’t do much this is what I can do.

I can continue to bring people together through the written word. I will be hosting another round of the Love Notes Postcard Project, sooner than the original expected mid-April date.

We will begin Sunday, March 29th

This round will be a little different. You will be able to join in the old fashion way by sending physical postcards plus there is an option to participate that is purely digital.

The Love Notes Postcard Project is a free, three-week project that encourages individuals to connect through snail mail (and now email). I will match you up with another participant in the group and each Sunday you will receive a writing prompt so that you have a jumping-off point for what to share with your partner.

This global project brings people together and encourages connection through the written word. I have been hosting this project for about seven years and have been blown away by the friendships that have been made. and the kindness that has been shared. Sign up to be a part of this upcoming round and spread a little bit of joy and light during this dark time.

I can also bring people together virtually to connect, meditate, write, and simply be with one another. I have hosted two online gatherings recently and am so grateful for the individuals who showed up. It is wonderful to see one another even if only through the screen.

My next Community Circle is Monday, March 23rd from 8-9pm EST

I am craving simplicity and look forward to showing up here more often. This is my virtual front porch. I invite you to grab a cup of coffee and settle in. I look forward to getting to connecting with you and walking together on this journey of life.

Sending so much love to all of you!

Xoxo
Jennifer

let’s be friends on instagram :: @jbelthoff

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Love Notes Postcard Project is Back!

Is your mailbox feeling lonely after the rush of holiday cards that swirled around? Are you now just receiving bills and mailers that end up in the trash? Well, it’s time to change that.

Join in on the next round of the Love Notes Postcard Project.

What is the Postcard Project you ask? Great question.

It is a three-week-long snail mail adventure where you send and receive postcards through the mail, yes the real mail! After you sign up you are matched up with someone else in the group and each week you respond to the weekly prompt I provide, then drop your postcard in the mail.

It is super simple to participate in brings back the joy of the handwritten word. All you need is

3 stamps + 3 postcards (notecards works to) + 1 wide-open heart!

So what do you say? Are you ready to get back into the excitement of snail mail and possibly make a new friend?

Let’s be friends on Instagram @jbelthoff

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asking for help

I want you to know that you don’t have to do it all on your own.  

The dishes, the laundry, the grocery shopping.  There is a lot that you do to keep your world spinning smoothly.  Cleaning out the garage, wiping down the counter, remembering to take out the trash.  The list feels never-ending. There is also getting everyone where they need to be. Planning for the next troop meeting.  And trying to lift that side hustle off the ground that you are so passionate about.

I see you over there in your corner of the world.  I see how hard you work. How much you show up. How you make so many things happen and most of it occurs behind the scenes.  You give and you give and you give, never really expecting much in return.  

You are a freakin ROCKSTAR.  

But here’s the thing.  I know that the weight of the world feels like it is on your shoulders.  You are carrying all of it and picking up more boulders along the way. But you don’t have to be doing that.  You don’t have to carry it all alone. It’s ok to let the dust and laundry pile up. It’s ok to take a break. It’s ok to ask for help.  

I know it’s hard.  Hard to reach out. Hard to let go.  Hard to give someone there own time to do something that you would have done in half the time.  

But all that responsibility isn’t yours alone.  There are people who will help if you ask. Some will do so willingly others may take a little more coaxing.  And there are others who can do what you are trying to do even better. Let them jump in. Let them help. Together we can do more.  You don’t have to do it all alone. 

You deserve to fill your tank.  You deserve to rest. To ease in.  To simply just be. You deserve to see how things can go beyond what you ever thought they could be when you have the right people in place doing their part.  

We need each other.  We need to reach out and to lean in.  Go ahead, take that first step today in asking for help and easing some of the weight you are carrying.  

What is one thing you can take off your plate today and ask someone to help out with? Share in the comments so that we can all cheer you on.

Let’s be friends on Instagram @jbelthoff

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seek out joy

In the tiny pockets of time when you are doing something ordinary, there is joy lingering right below the surface. You may not notice it as you move through your routines of life, but it is there waiting to be discovered. It wants to be acknowledged. It wants you to sink into its goodness and feel all the feels.

It is there with you when you wash the dishes, put away the groceries and make your to-do list.  It walks beside you as you feel the crunch of the leaves beneath your feet, see the light of the sun peeking between the trees, and hear the sound of the birds chirping.  And it doesn’t leave when you make your bed, fold the laundry, and bring your love a glass of water.  

It is right there waiting for you.  Inviting you in. Hoping you seek it out. 

Joy is a choice.  One that isn’t always easy to make,  I know that there are times we fall down the ‘whoa is me’ rabbit hole and it feels impossible to climb out.  I have been in that bunker many times, sinking into feelings of sadness and despair and inviting others to join in my misery.  It’s an easy road to navigate.

“Happiness is simple. Everything we do to find it is complicated.”

— Karen Mazen Miller

But here’s the thing.  Unearthing joy doesn’t have to be as hard as we think.  It is there, waiting for us. We just need to slow down long enough to be able to recognize and appreciate it.  

The feeling of the blanket on your skin in the morning. The smell of a fresh cup of coffee.  The way the stars twinkle in the sky. The warmth of the sun on your face. The sound of laughter.  

Notice, simply notice these little moments and sink into how they make you feel.  Do they bring a smile to your face, fill you up with a sense of wonder, calm your racing nerves?  If it’s even for a brief moment, that is something.  

Don’t let the joy slip away without giving thanks for its arrival.  Show gratitude for everything that opens your heart up. What you notice and appreciate you invite more of into your life.  

Choose to invite in more goodness! 

What do you want more of? How do you want to feel? Share below in the comments so that you can set the energy of your intention into motion.

share your truth

I stand in the shadows of my own disappointment wondering if I will ever be able to pull myself out of this sorrow.  My inner critic is on a roll and has an awful lot to say. About how I am not good enough. And who do I think I am anyway to try to make such a big thing happen.  She is relentless and won’t stop. Has this ever happened to you?  

All of her words are washing over me, penetrating my heart and tearing me down.  It is painful to stand in this darkness. I want to curl up and hide. I don’t want anyone to see me wallowing.  But I know that I can’t stay in the dark forever. I need to emerge from the shadows even if that means my scars will be seen. 

And so I step out into the light.  Eyes squinting, unsure of where I am.  It takes a lot for me to share this pain. To show up with my heart on my sleeve.  To allow others to see my failure. Even though I don’t want to, I know that it must be done.  I cannot hide in my bunker forever. 

I reach out, looking for a friendly face. I share my pain.  Share my heartache. Share my disappointment. In this sharing, something beyond expectation happens.  People lean in. Hold my hand. And even walk the path with me. They show me the way when I don’t know which way to go.  They remind me that I am never alone.    

I didn’t want anyone to know that I fell flat on my face.  I didn’t want anyone to know that I failed. But here’s the thing, we don’t always make it to the top of the mountain.  Sometimes we stumble. Sometimes we fall. It is all a part of living. And all of it matters, not just the pretty perfect pieces but the messy ones as well.  

And so I encourage you to not hide your pain.  Don’t stand alone in your shadows. Others may not have walked through what you have, but they have navigated their own struggles.  They know what it feels like to not feel good enough. They know what it feels to fall down and have to peel themselves off the floor.  

I would still be standing in my own darkness, feeling like I wasn’t good enough had I not reached out.  It is in opening our hearts and sharing our experiences that we connect. Being vulnerable. Not always having to appear perfect.  We need to share our raw, honest self. Even when it isn’t pretty.  

I am grateful that I didn’t stay hidden.  Grateful that I had the courage to share my truth.  I am coming out on the other side with so much tucked inside my heart.  I stand a little bit taller than before. Yes, I am not where I want to be.  But I am here, surrounded by love. I took a chance. I tried. And I am better for it.  I have found a new pair of wings to help me fly and only one question remains.

What will I do with my new found wings?