the open road

“We travel, initially, to lose ourselves; and we travel, next to find ourselves. We travel to open our hearts and eyes and learn more about the world than our newspapers will accommodate. We travel to bring what little we can, in our ignorance and knowledge, to those parts of the globe whose riches are differently dispersed. And we travel, in essence, to become young fools again- to slow time down and get taken in, and fall in love once more.”

— Pico Ayer

In my early twenties I drove cross country with a friend and someone she knew whom I had never met.  This person I never met had just gotten a new car and wanted to take it across the country.  Was I up for the adventure?  You bet!  Did I mind that I didn't know the girl who owned the car, not one bit. 

We had one plan in mind, make it to California where Sara's mom lived.  What happened in between NJ and CA was left to unfold as we went along.  We had a few places we could crash for the night but besides that the road was our opportunity to explore.  It was on this trip that my love affair with the open road began.  I was enamored with the endless possibility that we could go anywhere.  

With open roads before us there was no one except ourselves telling us to go left, right, no...LEFT!!!  I saw things I never saw before, like the wide open sky, billions of stars, and the sun setting in the grand canyon.  Nothing had to be perfect, we made it up as we went along.  

As I have gotten older and my days feel full with errands and a long list of things to do adventure has fallen to the bottom of the list.  I forget sometimes that it doesn't have to be a big trip across the country.  Adventure is always waiting for me right around the corner.  It is a block I have never traveled down, a trail I didn't know existed, taking a different way home and seeing things I never knew where there.  Yes, there is always something new to see and experience, I just have to be open to it.  

And so I am opening my eyes a little bit more.  Seeking out the unexpected.  Looking around the corner and taking the long way home.  I am going on little adventures and stepping outside of my comfort zone.  I don't know what will unfold, but that is all part of the adventure.  

What adventure have you taken recently?  Where have you gone near or far that has expanded you in some way?  Together lets make a pact to adventure more often.  

smile more

If you do just one thing today I encourage you to smile more
Let your face shine
Even when you aren’t feeling your best
When frustration is mounting
And you wish you could click your heals and be back home
Yes, in these moments smile
The very act of doing this will change how you feel instantly
Go ahead, give it a try right now
Lift your head up and smile
Feel the way it brings happiness to your heart
One small micro movement creating such a positive affect
When you smile at others they smile back
A chain reaction of happiness
So go ahead, smile more
Smile at strangers
Smile when you feel like stamping your feet and throwing a fit
Smile when you are sitting alone at your desk
Just smile more
Your heart will thank you

choosing happy

“The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”

— Martin Luther King Jr

As I opened the door to my apartment I realized that life as I knew it was changed forever.  Things that had held a certain space for years were gone.  Pictures torn from the wall, the space where the television sat was now empty, draws pulled open and pieces of my heart spilled all over the floor.  

I knew this moment was coming.  I had orchestrated the entire destruction.  I made the poor choices which lead to it's ultimate crumbling.  I stood face to face with what I knew I wanted and I didn't know how to take that first step forward.  He was gone.  He was really gone.  I knew it was going to happen but I wasn't prepared for how it was going to feel.  

We had spent years together, not only as a couple but co-workers.  Almost every minute of every day we were with each other.  All of that was over now.  I had to pick up the pieces of my life and put them back together.  I had no idea how to do this.  

During our years together we had many happy moments filled with deep laughter and love.  But like all couples we also had those darker days.  As our length of time together grew those darker days were more often and the laughter less and less.  I knew I couldn't go on like this forever.  I needed more from life.  More sunshine.  More laughter.  More trust.  More kindness.  

I had no idea how to live life as a single twenty something.  I never lived on my own and always feared doing so.  Yet there I was standing in my apartment surrounded by only my things and I knew that I had two choices.  I could crumble in the face of this destruction.  I could fall apart and let the world swallow me whole or I could pick up the pieces and find my way back to myself.  

During my relationship with him I lost who I was.  I was going through the motions of life but I wasn't really living.  There was no passion, very little joy, and many moments of incredible despair.  This wasn't the way my life was meant to be.  I felt that in my heart and I knew that now was the moment for me to find who I am.

I was no longer going to rely on someone else to make me happy.  I was going to find it myself.  To do this I knew I had to do something that I really struggled with; putting myself first.   I had to listen deeply to what I wanted.  I had to unearth my passions and find out what really ignited my spark.  

I decided to live in a full experimental phase.  Trying anything and everything that interested me.  Hikes in the woods, days spent painting, a 50 mile bike ride, hours and hours spent in the bookstore or library.  If I wanted to do it, I did.  If I didn't, I said no. 

Listening to your heart is one of the best things you can ever do for yourself!  

It took me awhile to learn how to listen to my heart and to get up the courage to follow it's voice.  It wasn't easy for me to put myself first and choose what I really wanted.  There were many moments that I just wanted to crumble.  It was work, so much work navigating this path to happiness.  There were times when I felt like I wasn't cut out for it.  Moment spent sobbing in bed wondering what I got myself into.  

There were times when I would slide back into old patterns but I never gave up.   I kept trying, even when I failed.  Things don't get handed to us. I knew I had to show up day after day and put in the hard work.  It is was only then that I was able to unearth the beauty hidden below the surface.  It was there all along, but I never gave it a chance to shine.  Through the hard work and the struggle it came out.  Had I choose not to find my own happy I never would have unearthed it.  

Life isn't always easy.  But it is how we choose to deal with the hard times that shape us.  How do you show up when the struggle get's real?  How do you unearth the beauty admits the heartache and pain?  How do you choose happy?

love notes virtual dock

The first round of the Love Notes Postcard Project (#lovenotesjb) for 2016 has just begun.  If you missed it do not worry as I will be hosting it three more times this year.  

I love this project for it's simplicity.  3 postcards + 3 stamps = 3 weeks of happy mail!  Plus, I provide a writing prompt so there is never any questions as to what to write about.  

When I first began this project I had no idea that it would expand to all over the world  This round we have individuals participating from:

• Australia
• Bahamas
• Canada
• Denmark
• Iceland
• Ireland
• Italy
• Japan
• Sweden
• Switzerland
• United Kingdom 
• United States 

It is incredible to me how one simple note in the mail can change a persons day for the better, bring happiness, and begin friendships.  But that is what Love Notes does.  It ignites sparks of love and kindness and spreads them throughout the world.  The world could always use a little more love and kindness!  

I wish there was a way for me to wave a magic wand and have everyone who is participating together.  It would be so lovely to see be gathered around one very large table chatting about our lives, sharing our dreams, and gushing over our mutual passion for snail mail.  But since that is not physically possible I invite you to join me on our virtual dock where you can stop by people's digital front porches and say hello.  Get a peek into their world and see where they are writing from.  Stop by and say hello.  

Love Notes Postcard Project {14} *some* Participant Blogs
(in no particular order)

• shannan ejoys life!
• thoughts along the way: musings of a pilgrim
• faux toes - joy captured by Kristen Roedner
• judy around the corner
• lori's kreations
• randisch
• crash your stash
• everything jenni
• studio neela
• gypsy heart and soul
• {grace} rejoice in the beauty that surrounds you
• little scraps of magic
• cynful musings
• a myeloma widow's journey
• debra fillingim
• color me happy by melissa
• jess witkins
• jerseytaurus143
• unraveling my heart the write way
• createology
• alelisima
• angela heather
• britta gene
• littlest finch
• mary janes studio
• lunch hacker
• asphalt and air
• story girl art
• the geeky shopaholic
• something from nothing
• the creativity caravan
• mindy tsonas
• gentle threads
• the mountain mermaid
• janet crosby.

In our social world of facebook, instagram, and twitter we forget that so many people are sharing more of their hearts on their blogs.  But they are still out there, and I know they would enjoy if you popped over for a visit and you would totally make their day if you left a comment.  

But if you are looking to stay social you can find Love Notes:

• On Facebook - stop by and join a community of love
• On Instagram by searching  #lovenotesjb

dear 2016

Dear 2016,

I have big plans for you.  It is time for me to dare greatly and put into action many of the dreams that are living in my heart.  I can see how all of the work I have done thus far has lead me to here.  I am exactly where I am meant to be.  I know I want to stretch further, reach higher, and take incredible risks.  I don't want to play it safe.  I want to try even with the possibility of failure.  You never know unless you try.  

I am on a journey and I know where I want to go.  

• I want to connect in person with my blog readers.  I want to see their smile, hear their stories, and encourage them to take their own brave leaps forward
• I want to move my body & become certified to teach yoga
• I want to introduce more people to the powers of writing
• I want to gather
• I want to laugh
• I want to spread joy

I know doing each one of these things requires me to put my heart out there.  I am ready for this.  I am ready to be seen.  It is my time to shine and there is no reason for me to be living small.  

I am going to pursue my dreams.  I am going to chase after them with my whole heart and see where they take me.  I am going to invite people in and encourage them to open up.  I am going to create a safe space for individuals to gather.  Yes, I am.  

Never in a million years did I think that I would be where I am today.  But here I am with my heart wide open.  I sought out what moved me, I found my way, and came home to myself.  I have carved my own path and want to continue to do so.  

2016 I hope you are ready because now is the time.  I am ready to shine.  Let's do this!  

Love,
Jennifer

Check In

How about you?  What are your hopes and dreams for 2016?  What do you want to reach towards?  What do you hope to learn?

Love Notes Postcard Project

The next round of Love Notes begins January 10th! 

All you need is:
   * 3 postcards
   * 3 stamps
   * an open heart

Kick the year off by sending a little bit of snail mail love.  Click HERE to say YES!

happy notes

Gratitude is a very important part of my self care practice.  I have tried to keep a gratitude journal but was never very good at showing up to it each day.  When I would remember to write in it I would see how long ago I was there and feel discouraged for not sticking with it.  Then the incredible idea for a happiness jar passed through my feed from the wonderful Elizabeth Gilbert.  It was simple -- one jar and tiny slips of paper.  Each day you write one thing that made you happy and drop it into the jar.  Easy peasy!  

This was the perfect solution for me because if I missed a day I never noticed and therefore my inner critique never got the chance to jump in and speak negative words.  I definitely missed many days but my jar still filled up with so many wonderful memories.  Simple moments that make this life extraordinary.  Like:

• Sharing sushi with Dustin
• A fun evening at the car show, lots of laughs, plenty of shine, and good people all around
• The sweet smell of wild orange as she rubbed it on my forehead and shoulders while in shavasana

Simple everyday moments that make this life extraordinary.  What a love about the happiness jar is how ordinary the moments are, yet they fill my heart with so much love!  

I have taken the time to read through each one of my happy moments from 2015.  It was fun to go back and read about moments that I forgot about.  I was also able to see how much happiness there was even during such a tragic time.  Each happy moment is filled with love, connection, and so much goodness.  

The jar is now empty and ready for a brand new year of happy.  I am excited to continue this tradition.  I usually write out my note before I slip into bed.  It is the perfect way to end the day.  

If you are interested in doing this I encourage you to go for it.  Any jar and slips of paper will do.  One thing I do recommend is including the date on each note.  This way when you look back you know exactly the day it happened.  You can begin a happiness jar any time of the year, it doesn't have to happen on January 1st.  And if you miss a day or a bunch of days, no big deal ... just pick up wherever you are.  Fill that jar with loads of happiness.