it is all going to be ok
If I could tell you one thing right now it would be that it is all going to be ok. I know it doesn't seem like it. The road you are on feels dark with no light in sight. But believe me the light is there, you just have to seek it out. The world wants to open it's arms up to you but you need to be willing to put in some work yourself. Opportunity does not just come knocking. It takes time. It takes determination. It takes being brave enough to follow your own heart and reach out and ask for help when you need it.
You my dear are an incredible human being who deserves the best. Your warm heart and gentle soul are a gift to this world. You deserve to be cherished. Yes, I know you have made mistakes. We all have. It is not your mistakes that define you but what you choose to do in the aftermath of them that does. Do not hold onto these mistakes with deep regret. Understand your decision for making them and forgive yourself. Yes, forgive yourself. Do not look or wait for anyone else to forgive you. Just forgive yourself.
Before you fell into this darkness what infused your soul with light? What made you smile? What brought you joy? Go back to your roots of happiness and lean deeply into them. Do not ever expect another human being to be the one to make you happy. You need to make yourself happy first. I know it sounds cliche, but it is true. Find the things that feed your soul and devour them. Do not ever let anyone take them away from you. For these are the things that ignite your spark. These are your gifts to the world.
I see you deep inside your sadness. I know it hurts. But what I want you to know is that you are not alone and you have the power to change it. Shift your perception and you shift everything. You are standing here with a clean slate. A chance to start all over again. I know that you never expected or wanted to be starting all over again but what a divine thing to do with all the lessons you have tucked into your pockets. You are wiser now. Stronger. You know what you don't want, and sometimes that is more important than knowing what you do want.
Lean into the unknown. Share your heart. It may feel broken right now but you still have so much of it to give. Reach out. Tell your stories. Let other's in. Give yourself permission to feel the light that is shining on you and let go of what is no longer serving you. Step boldly onto the path that you always wanted to travel. Do the things that make you happy. Re-discover the pieces of yourself that you have tucked away.
It won't be easy. But nothing ever is. One thing that is for sure though, is that it will be worth it. All the hard work and unearthing you do will bring forth the bright light inside of you that has dimmed. You got this, you totally got this. And remember, it is all going to be ok.